Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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