Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
