i think my mom watched the whole time
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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