Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
