I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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