talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Randomize
