The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
