We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
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