When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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