so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Randomize
