Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Randomize
