WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Randomize
