I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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