It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
