why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Randomize
