Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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