bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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