Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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