After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
