I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
