Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Randomize
