At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Holy sore nipples Batman
I can feel your judgement through the phone
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
