butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
