sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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