My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize