im having a threesome with these popsicles
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
vagina is talking i cant
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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