I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize
