I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
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