Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(631): View more from New York

Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin

(856): View more from New Jersey

Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.

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(347): View more from New York

Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.

Fav 65 1884 20125
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(613): View more from Ontario

You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.

Fav 9 4948 1168
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(516): View more from New York

i have one question about last night

(646): View more from New York

if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain

Fav 4 4643 1210
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(620): View more from Kansas

He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.

Fav 20 5352 1955
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(773): View more from Illinois

You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.

Fav 14 3396 1260
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(641): View more from Iowa

is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?

Fav 6 3827 1840
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(303): View more from Colorado

It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air

Fav 0 492 276
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(541): View more from Oregon

My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic

Fav 0 29 119
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