i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
