Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Randomize
