The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
