No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
