So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
You can't just leave with hair like that
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Randomize
