check it out our google latitudes are spooning
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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