Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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