Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
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