I feel like I'm in dance class right now
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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