Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I think im going to throw up on grandma
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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