I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Randomize
