you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Drake has all the answers
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Randomize
