Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
