And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
