You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
COCAINE IS GR8
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
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