we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Randomize
