she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
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