Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
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