in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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