Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Randomize
