You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
He is an equal opportunity slut.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
